In the midst of the storm

I now know why the ancient greeks believed gods ruled them from atop a mountain with bolts of lightning and claps of thunder. Sitting under a giant umbrella at an outdoor cafe in my pleasant mountain town I watched -- experienced -- a fantastic thunderstorm. Here in the Pirin Mountains the thunder shouts with such a voice that sends a shot of adreneline directly to your heart. For that moment, in which you must decide if that is God speaking or the weather coming off of Pirin, your heart stops entirely, the restats in double time. Those adreneline induces endorphins float to your toes just long enough for you to forget you are alone in this town. Perhaps coming down from this rush is like any other. The previous pain still remains.

I do not want to be whiny-lonely girl -- I think I will love this place. But for today, I cling to the next chance to speak in English with a friend. I will disregard common courtesy to read and respond to an SMS from another lonely volunteer (Absnese must truly make the heart grow fonder- now we friends of less than three months are reminding each other of our love and mutual sense of missing). I would pay double its value for an internet connection in my flat. After a phone call from a Bulgarian English speaking friend who promises to visit in a month, I jump up and down for joy. This is loneliness.

I killed a giant spider last night. In America, I would have first gotten my father. Not here? Get the vaccuum cleaner and such the jerk into spider oblivion. Oh, I haven't got a vaccuum cleaner (here, the Bulgarian word for vaccuum cleaner literally translated is 'dust sucker'). Now this guy was big, too big to smash with my flimsy TP. He got a shoe to the wall, then cleaned off with toilet paper. Fifteen minutes later I had to pound on my back door to chase off the cats having outrageously loud sex on my back porch. It was obscene. I am truly living on my own.

Its not so bad. I've inquired about the gym here and will start working out soon. I should be getting cable internet in my flat in the next week as well. I have other Americans with in two hours travel. Best of all, I know God is my strength and anywhere I am, He is near to me and providing for my next step. That is just hard to remember sometimes. That God I am in a beautiful country, with a great PC staff and a group from which I will gain life-lasting friendships.
Vcichko Hubavo and Chao from the heart of the Balkans.